Five. 5. Cinq. 1-2-3-4-5. Yes, I have 5 kids. All full siblings at that! Don’t pretend like that question didn’t pass through your noggin. So, here I am, living the single mother dream outside Toronto with 5 kiddos. Hence the nickname they so strategically crafted themselves;
Not gonna lie, these 5 little babes of mine have exemplary brains and are constantly putting me to shame with their knowledge of the world around them. And they’re freakin cute. See for yourself:
So back to it. It’s been just them and I since the twins were born (see those 2 little nuggets in the middle there?) and while it has me pulling out whatever hair I have left since childbirth, I honestly wouldn’t change it for a thing.
Yes, I said twins. Those little cuties are fraternal (in case the boy/girl dynamic didn’t give it away) and trust me, that ultrasound was full of colourful language that is NOT worth repeating. But, it’s been pretty freakin special… twins are a blessing and I have absolutely loved and still love watching these two grow. #twinmama
I think I always wanted to be a Mom. I only say think because there were days-of-plenty in my late teen/very early 20’s that I was likely the most selfish human alive. I lived what I thought was my best life during that time, and being a mother was the last thing on my mind. But, life changes and my maternal instincts went into overdrive…. hello, 5 babies!
I do this alone for the most part. Their father isn’t involved and hasn’t been involved for many years. I played the victim for a few years and have recently decided that those victim years are better off in my past so I can push forward and make the life that both my kids and I deserve. I am blessed with a tight-knit village who oh-so-wonderfully help me. As much as I think I’m SuperWoman, I simply am not and have found out (the hard way) that I can’t be in 5 places at once. And trust me, I’ve tried. Mission failed.
Motherhood can be lonely at times, as we’re all on different paths and as much as being a momma intertwines us, the individual journeys are so incredibly different. I figure if I can share a few experiences, it may make one person feel a little bit more normal and hell, maybe even smile. Because a lot of milk is spilled over here, and we have Sharpie all over our walls… and furniture. My face is in a constant state of “WTF?”
So, here I am. Battling single motherhood with 5 kids and zero help from their father. Many tears are shed in this household and every day I tell myself “you’ll laugh one day” and now I’m freaking out that they’re growing too fast. I’m staring at my 4 year old twins right now and not sure where the time went- but I do know that time is the biggest thief of them all.
Parenthood is a wild ride. And doing it alone with 5 kids? While I may be waving the white flag more often than not, I’m still standing 😉